I choose to see how I've succeeded, not how I've failed

Recently, a dental crown came loose.

It filled a gap from a tooth that I lost years ago due to neglect.

Root canal and all.

Back in the day, I would brush less frequently, drink soda, and view dental visits as things to avoid.

The result was that I lost a couple of teeth and had some others that needed much help to save.

Since then, my personal dental care has improved significantly.

And, thank God, I haven't even had a cavity in quite some time.

So, when it became clear that I needed to replace the crown (and went through the process of fitting for a new one,) it brought me back to that time when it seemed like I was in for a rude awakening every time I visited the dentist.

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If you want to fix your results, fix your mind!

We went to work on the "gremlin" and started the process of flipping the script.

โ€œ๐™„ ๐™ข๐™–๐™ฎ ๐™๐™–๐™ซ๐™š ๐™›๐™–๐™ž๐™ก๐™š๐™™ ๐™—๐™ช๐™ฉ ๐™„ ๐™๐™–๐™ซ๐™š ๐™–๐™ก๐™จ๐™ค ๐™จ๐™ช๐™˜๐™˜๐™š๐™š๐™™๐™š๐™™ ๐™ž๐™ฃ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š ๐™ฅ๐™–๐™จ๐™ฉ ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™™ ๐™˜๐™–๐™ฃ ๐™จ๐™ช๐™˜๐™˜๐™š๐™š๐™™ ๐™–๐™œ๐™–๐™ž๐™ฃ ๐™ž๐™ฃ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š ๐™›๐™ช๐™ฉ๐™ช๐™ง๐™š.โ€

โ€œ๐™”๐™ค๐™ช๐™ง ๐™™๐™ž๐™จ๐™ฉ๐™ง๐™–๐™˜๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™จ๐™š๐™ง๐™ซ๐™š๐™จ ๐™ข๐™š ๐™ฃ๐™ค ๐™ฅ๐™ช๐™ง๐™ฅ๐™ค๐™จ๐™š.โ€

โ€œ๐™„๐™› ๐™ฎ๐™ค๐™ช ๐™๐™–๐™ซ๐™š ๐™–๐™ฃ ๐™ค๐™ฅ๐™ž๐™ฃ๐™ž๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™–๐™—๐™ค๐™ช๐™ฉ ๐™ข๐™ฎ ๐™›๐™–๐™ž๐™ก๐™ช๐™ง๐™š, ๐™จ๐™ฉ๐™–๐™ฉ๐™š ๐™ž๐™ฉ ๐™–๐™จ ๐™– ๐™›๐™–๐™˜๐™ฉ. ๐˜ฟ๐™ค๐™ฃโ€™๐™ฉ ๐™—๐™–๐™จ๐™š ๐™ž๐™ฉ ๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™š๐™ข๐™ค๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ค๐™ฃ.โ€

From there, we moved into the core objective of the session.

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How to disaster-proof your business and your life, part II

In my last post, I shared insights from a group of leaders about how to position ourselves and our businesses for coronavirus and โ€œdisaster-proofโ€ our lives moving forward. This post follows along the same theme and highlights the insights of some powerful coaches.

How to Disaster-Proof Your Communication with Lila Smith, communication expert

As Smith sees it, COVID has confronted us with our core values. We have been forced to โ€œcheck inโ€ with ourselves and reassess our past behaviors as we consider life moving forward. What is it that is most important to us and should be performed and engaged with more in the future? And what have we been doing that hasnโ€™t served us and should be scaled back as we begin to emerge from quarantine?

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Your behavior won't change until the way you see yourself does

In his book Atomic Habits, author James Clear explains why habits are so difficult to break.

It's because we tend to focus on surface-level actions.

Most people start by focusing on outcome-based goals like...

  • โ€œI want to lose 20 pounds.โ€

  • โ€œI want to write a best-selling book.โ€

But these are surface level changes.

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How to disaster-proof your business and your life

Back in 2020, I conducted a series of conversations with leading thinkers, business experts and LinkedIn influencers. I wanted to learn what we could have done (and should now be doing moving forward) to get ourselves ready -- mentally and with our businesses and learning -- to better position ourselves for this (and future) disruption.

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Lead from values

The fifth and final component of this step is to be sure to lead from values. Values are the core components of a personโ€™s deepest beliefs, the concepts that they hold most dear and that drive decision making, or at least should. When a leader takes the time to identify her deepest values, she is likelier to make satisfying choices and remain consistent in her actions and choices. Moreover, if she is effective in articulating her values then others will understand her reasoning and be more inclined to support her process.

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Replace "No" with "Not Yet"

I was eleven years old, and I was thoroughly embarrassed.

A week earlier, one of the counselors had asked me if I would share a Torah thought at an upcoming Shabbos (Sabbath) camp meal in front of hundreds of others.

I was a pretty confident kid, so I agreed.

And then I spent many minutes preparing.

When the time arrived, I stood up on the bench and started speaking.

Towards the end, my mind froze and I couldn't remember the next part.

Somehow, I got through it, but I crumbled inside from embarrassment.

Which resulted in me burying myself underneath the table afterwards in shame.

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To Get More Done, Plan the Night Before

From the moment we wake up each day, weโ€™re faced with a continuous flow of choices. Many are minor and some are major. Even things that donโ€™t seem so important, like what to take along for lunch or which task to complete first, can become bigger deals when we start to consider how aligned they are (or arenโ€™t) with our goals and strategic priorities.

When weโ€™re confronted with too many options, we tend to feel overwhelmed, anxious, stressed or otherwise out of sorts. This is known as decision fatigue, a state of mental overload that can impede our ability to make additional decisions. When our minds are fatigued, we tend to make worse decisions and exercise less self-control.

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Give, and you shall receive!

โ€œMore than the calf wants to suckle, the cow wants to nurse.โ€ Talmud (Pesachim 112a)

Parents are natural givers.

They want to give even more than their kids want to take.

Which is why itโ€™s so gratifying to be able to spend quality time with our kids and contribute to their happiness.

So, as much as my son was excited for me to join him at a camp water park a couple of weeks ago, I was happier to be able to bring him joy with my presence and participation.

This Talmudic principal, in my view, applies to teachers and coaches as well.

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